Sorry these posts are so out of order. Chock it up to either Fibro Fog or MS cognitive impairment, as I am not so sure which one is belting me over the head right now. LOL
I survived the Holiday's and healed up well from the mastectomy according to my wonderful surgeon. He told me to keep on doing my rehab and get those arms working so I would have full mobility and range of motion and I did and I do! Still kind of weak but improving over the Holidays. What was not improving was the neuropathy in my hands and general weakness in my legs.
I went to Neurologist number 3 in November and first thing she wanted to do was run a 3T MRI on my brain as the earlier ones were so bad, and of course put me on an antidepressant! ARRGGHH. If I hear that again I am going postal and rip someones head off.
I went up to Methodist Hospital and had the MRI. What a cool place and great tech people. It was so loud though. No wonder they gave me huge ear plugs.
While getting the results at my follow up appt with Neuro #3, she kind of shook her head and confirmed the transverse myelitis diagnosis and wanted to do a lumbar puncture for MS.
We set it up but I backed out after reading up on the procedure and that place we had scheduled at did NOT follow the recommended 4 hour laying flat on back post puncture protocol. Yikes, all I needed was to get a colossal headache and need a blood patch. So I canceled it and decided that after the Holidays I would try to get into the best Neurology clinic in our area and see what they had to say. I had lost faith in Neuro #3.
Meanwhile on the breast front (or lack of it!) I found that I could wear a regular bra and put in fiberf oam prostheses and look and feel like a normal human again. What a find. I ordered a few more of the bras from Title 9 and a couple of foam inserts from the Breast Cancer place and had my solution. I also found I could wear my 36D underwire bras and use bigger prostheses and look pretty sexy again with fancier clothes. This is all good. What is a pain is the hot flashes I get since I am officially menopausal after my surgery. Ugh. Will deal with that later. I do sweat a lot under my artificial breasts and its annoying as all get out especially with the hot flashes.
Meanwhile, I am still living on Gabapentin, Tramadol and Valium. My legs are starting to swell in the afternoon and I am tired and woozy all the time. And I hurt.
Showing posts with label mastectomy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mastectomy. Show all posts
Monday, October 19, 2009
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
More History....Chemo or Surgery or what?
I was totally unravelled by now. Stress is not my strong suit and I try not to get into stressful situations because I worry. Health is a worry. Luckily up until now I had never been seriously ill or even sick with the flu more than once. Colds even were minor things. Wow, Cancer! Chemo. Numbness and nerve pain.
I got a referral to a pain management/Neurologist who ran a bunch of nerve conduction tests with needles and there seemed to be OK signals running. He did MRI's of everything and meanwhile gave me prescription for Neurontin, gabapentin and tramadol for the pain. Oh I previously been prescripted Lyrica for the nerve pain and low back pain. I called it my stupid drug because it really knocked me on my butt mentally and hardly touched the nerve pain. I really felt loopy and ended up stopping it after a week. That made the nerve pain come back twice as strong. So I decided to go with the new drugs, and even though the Neurontin was the older version of Lyrica, this crazy Neuro thought it was a good choice. Tramadol he told me was non addictive too. Also I could continue to take Xanax to settle me down. At this point I really didn't care about getting possibly dependent on Xanax as the pain was excruciating, and making me very anxious. The combo helped a bit, rendering the pain bearable, but the Neurontin made me almost as loopy and lethargic as Lyrica and made my ankles swell some. The Xanax, all of 2 daily doses of a whopping .125 MG really helped me hold onto my sanity. So now I was a druggie after all my life of avoiding drugs like the plague they are. ARRGGHH! I truly felt like a failure by comprising my beliefs.
I decided to go over my choices with my great Naturopathic Doctor. Dr. Bob. Glad I did too. Knowing my pesticide history as he did after helping me get through a bout of chronic fatigue a while back, he advised me to skip the chemo and just have the surgery. Like what does one do when there is a bad spot on an apple? Why cut it out, of course. That did it for me.
I recalled the skeptical look on the surgeon's face when he heard the Anderson people wanted to do 24 weeks of chemo prior to surgery. So I called and scheduled an appointment and went in to talk to him about doing the surgery without the chemo. He felt the tumor again and said why sure, why not? I asked if he thought he could get it all out with clean margins and he said he was very sure he could do that too. I liked his attitude and his confidence. I asked to be scheduled the next day. He laughed. Right.... I did get on the schedule three weeks hence which would have been about a year ago on Sept 15th 2008.
Oh and I figured since there was in situ's in the left side as well that I get a double mastectomy while I was at it. I always wanted a breast reduction and this was my ultimate chance. I had studied my options and it looked like the best for me. No more mammograms, no more chance of the breast cancer popping up later. I wanted the cancer behind me. No reconstruction either. Why? One, I was a smoker and the implant guy probably would not deal with me. Was I going to quit under this pressure. HELL NO! The other options included moving tissue from either my back or my abdomen up to my chest and that would require a second surgery. No thank you to that! Also the double option meant I could have whatever side breasts I wanted when i wanted them. A's for sports and motorcycle riding (those big dudes flop around something wicked on the bumps! and get in the way of tennis or golf swings) B's for everyday wear and D's or Double D's for the sexy going out wear. I liked the idea of the flexibility of the prostheses. ( I still do a year later. Good decision!)
Well, hurricane Ike derailed the plans. Sept 13 and all hell broke loose here in Houston. We stayed home this time since the storm was predicted to exceed a cat 3. Monday morning, surgery day, there was no power and the hospital was totally damaged so no surgery. We ended spent a powerless week living in the RV on generator power in the garage. Luckily the weather was gorgeous after the storm and not hot at all because the wait was horribly stressful and my numb hands and feet were just getting worse.
Finally Monday the 29th of September arrived and surgery happened.... that's the next story.
I got a referral to a pain management/Neurologist who ran a bunch of nerve conduction tests with needles and there seemed to be OK signals running. He did MRI's of everything and meanwhile gave me prescription for Neurontin, gabapentin and tramadol for the pain. Oh I previously been prescripted Lyrica for the nerve pain and low back pain. I called it my stupid drug because it really knocked me on my butt mentally and hardly touched the nerve pain. I really felt loopy and ended up stopping it after a week. That made the nerve pain come back twice as strong. So I decided to go with the new drugs, and even though the Neurontin was the older version of Lyrica, this crazy Neuro thought it was a good choice. Tramadol he told me was non addictive too. Also I could continue to take Xanax to settle me down. At this point I really didn't care about getting possibly dependent on Xanax as the pain was excruciating, and making me very anxious. The combo helped a bit, rendering the pain bearable, but the Neurontin made me almost as loopy and lethargic as Lyrica and made my ankles swell some. The Xanax, all of 2 daily doses of a whopping .125 MG really helped me hold onto my sanity. So now I was a druggie after all my life of avoiding drugs like the plague they are. ARRGGHH! I truly felt like a failure by comprising my beliefs.
I decided to go over my choices with my great Naturopathic Doctor. Dr. Bob. Glad I did too. Knowing my pesticide history as he did after helping me get through a bout of chronic fatigue a while back, he advised me to skip the chemo and just have the surgery. Like what does one do when there is a bad spot on an apple? Why cut it out, of course. That did it for me.
I recalled the skeptical look on the surgeon's face when he heard the Anderson people wanted to do 24 weeks of chemo prior to surgery. So I called and scheduled an appointment and went in to talk to him about doing the surgery without the chemo. He felt the tumor again and said why sure, why not? I asked if he thought he could get it all out with clean margins and he said he was very sure he could do that too. I liked his attitude and his confidence. I asked to be scheduled the next day. He laughed. Right.... I did get on the schedule three weeks hence which would have been about a year ago on Sept 15th 2008.
Oh and I figured since there was in situ's in the left side as well that I get a double mastectomy while I was at it. I always wanted a breast reduction and this was my ultimate chance. I had studied my options and it looked like the best for me. No more mammograms, no more chance of the breast cancer popping up later. I wanted the cancer behind me. No reconstruction either. Why? One, I was a smoker and the implant guy probably would not deal with me. Was I going to quit under this pressure. HELL NO! The other options included moving tissue from either my back or my abdomen up to my chest and that would require a second surgery. No thank you to that! Also the double option meant I could have whatever side breasts I wanted when i wanted them. A's for sports and motorcycle riding (those big dudes flop around something wicked on the bumps! and get in the way of tennis or golf swings) B's for everyday wear and D's or Double D's for the sexy going out wear. I liked the idea of the flexibility of the prostheses. ( I still do a year later. Good decision!)
Well, hurricane Ike derailed the plans. Sept 13 and all hell broke loose here in Houston. We stayed home this time since the storm was predicted to exceed a cat 3. Monday morning, surgery day, there was no power and the hospital was totally damaged so no surgery. We ended spent a powerless week living in the RV on generator power in the garage. Luckily the weather was gorgeous after the storm and not hot at all because the wait was horribly stressful and my numb hands and feet were just getting worse.
Finally Monday the 29th of September arrived and surgery happened.... that's the next story.
Monday, September 21, 2009
History Continued...Breast Cancer!
I about freaked out when the mammogram came back with a serious lump and spots in the other breast. The doctor at the mammogram joint wanted me back ASAP for biopsy. So I scheduled one for the following Monday. The mammogram was on a Friday!
Luckily, they gave me a Valium, or rather half a valium, 5 mg before the procedure, and some nice lidocaine to numb the area. The biopsy went fine and then the tissue went off for testing. Not long after the procedure, say within 24 hours, my right hand started to go numb starting with the little fingers and proceeding within a week to take over the whole hand. I could not write, grasp anything and dropped things.
Next I went back for a biopsy on the left breast and as with the right hand, the left started to go numb a few days after the procedure. Ouch! Not only were my hands numb but they hurt like holy hell. Burning pain etc.
My Primary Doc prescribed Cymbalta, like I was deficient in it. OK, being all stressed out now waiting for the biopsy results, I agreed to give it a try. OH MY GAWD!. After the third dose, I almost passed out, dizzy, foggy brained, pulse racing, couldn't breathe! My husband called my best friend who is a paramedic and she and her husband, also a paramedic came racing over and helped me through it. The solution? Xanax. Luckily I had some around even if it was a few years out of date. It stopped the reaction to Cymbalta within 10 minutes. Thank goodness. What a horrible horrible drug. Who the heck created this monster?
Nothing was helping the pain in my hands either and I was getting more and more disabled and unable to cook, write, type or use my camera. Scary!
Then the results came back from the biospy: Cancer. Stage 2, ER+ PR+. And it was off to MD Anderson for the possible treatment options. And I didn't like what I heard one little bit!!!! Remember cancer is big business and although Anderson is the best in the country for cancer, its big enough business that they advertise on the nightly news.
I was told that I needed 24 weeks of chemo then a mastectomy then tamoxifen for 5 years. After having sprayed pesticides for years and knowing I was already toxic I did NOT want chemo at any rate. Frankly I knew it would kill me. I would rather die from falling off my motorcycle than from being systematically poisoned to death. I did have time to research it. I went to meet with a local general surgeon to see about having a port put in. He gave me the strangest look when i said they wanted to do chemo for 24 weeks prior to surgery. That look stayed with me. More on that later.
I researched on the internet for the efficacy of the chemo and red the hundred pages of side effect including losing my hair, maybe some heart damage, etc etc and got madder and madder. Even with the spin on the great odds of surviving with my cancer after chemo, the real numbers were not great at all. Chemo would give me about the same chance of survival as surgery and nothing else. What about radiation? I got another appt with the oncologist and she said point blank that there was no other way to treat the cancer than the chemo and radiation was not an option. I left with no decision.
Luckily, they gave me a Valium, or rather half a valium, 5 mg before the procedure, and some nice lidocaine to numb the area. The biopsy went fine and then the tissue went off for testing. Not long after the procedure, say within 24 hours, my right hand started to go numb starting with the little fingers and proceeding within a week to take over the whole hand. I could not write, grasp anything and dropped things.
Next I went back for a biopsy on the left breast and as with the right hand, the left started to go numb a few days after the procedure. Ouch! Not only were my hands numb but they hurt like holy hell. Burning pain etc.
My Primary Doc prescribed Cymbalta, like I was deficient in it. OK, being all stressed out now waiting for the biopsy results, I agreed to give it a try. OH MY GAWD!. After the third dose, I almost passed out, dizzy, foggy brained, pulse racing, couldn't breathe! My husband called my best friend who is a paramedic and she and her husband, also a paramedic came racing over and helped me through it. The solution? Xanax. Luckily I had some around even if it was a few years out of date. It stopped the reaction to Cymbalta within 10 minutes. Thank goodness. What a horrible horrible drug. Who the heck created this monster?
Nothing was helping the pain in my hands either and I was getting more and more disabled and unable to cook, write, type or use my camera. Scary!
Then the results came back from the biospy: Cancer. Stage 2, ER+ PR+. And it was off to MD Anderson for the possible treatment options. And I didn't like what I heard one little bit!!!! Remember cancer is big business and although Anderson is the best in the country for cancer, its big enough business that they advertise on the nightly news.
I was told that I needed 24 weeks of chemo then a mastectomy then tamoxifen for 5 years. After having sprayed pesticides for years and knowing I was already toxic I did NOT want chemo at any rate. Frankly I knew it would kill me. I would rather die from falling off my motorcycle than from being systematically poisoned to death. I did have time to research it. I went to meet with a local general surgeon to see about having a port put in. He gave me the strangest look when i said they wanted to do chemo for 24 weeks prior to surgery. That look stayed with me. More on that later.
I researched on the internet for the efficacy of the chemo and red the hundred pages of side effect including losing my hair, maybe some heart damage, etc etc and got madder and madder. Even with the spin on the great odds of surviving with my cancer after chemo, the real numbers were not great at all. Chemo would give me about the same chance of survival as surgery and nothing else. What about radiation? I got another appt with the oncologist and she said point blank that there was no other way to treat the cancer than the chemo and radiation was not an option. I left with no decision.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)